It takes more courage to suffer than to die.

You sit on your bathroom floor every night holding a knife close to your chest ‘cause no matter how insane it sounds to others, it makes you feel a little sane..? Life has got to the point of falling asleep crying and waking up crying. You have this pain in your chest that is running your entire existence. You feel empty from within and nobody knows because nobody can see or sense it. You try to fill in this void by going out and hanging out with your friends and family but you end up finding yourself staring at a wall and not thinking but just feeling empty. Your thoughts were destroying you so you stopped thinking. But the silence was killing you too. You don’t talk to people about yourself anymore because their comparison of “sad days” to your overwhelming, empty, almost calming desire to die doesn’t help in anyway. It really starts to get to you and it sucks. It really does. So you give up.

But.

What you don’t know is that it takes more courage to suffer than to die. And this suffering is not going to last too long. It may take you few years to untangle this mess that is stuck to you like a chewing gum to a shoe but once you are done getting rid of it you are going to feel freer than ever. And that feeling is worth living for.

I know there is comfort in being sad that any normal person wouldn’t know of, I know you don’t want to risk feeling the warmth to going back to feeling cold.

I also know that this world can be disgustingly cruel and make you feel so sick of breathing.

But, I will still ask you to be courageous.

There is definitely more love than there is hate, your mind might be saying otherwise to you, just shut him up.

You are going to fight even if you are tired.

It is okay even if the only thing you did today was breathe. You’re worth more than your darkness.

Suicide does not end the chances of life getting worse. It eliminates the chances of it ever getting better.

If you have had the thoughts of committing suicide, thank you for still being here, you’re strong and I love you.

Don’t you dare give up on this life. Not today. Not tomorrow. Not ever.

-SHS

Suicide helpline-02227546669